وزارد او دا وستساد
VIZITOR TO THE VESTSIDE
an
American blog of Iranian dissent

Dr. Bekardashian

As you know there's an abundant number of Persian plastic surgeons across the country, with a growing customer base and (Nose) Job market.

For some Iroonis if you haven't been under the knife, ya simply don't know what you're missing -- well, bone structure for starters, I say.

For the past decade we've seen the growth of Reality TV like a tumor metastasising on our psyche. One such purveyor has been the E! Network, with faux-shows like "Dr. 90210" which at one point featured two Persian plastic surgeons (brothers, no less) who brought in all the barbie and ken dolls of Los Angeles and reconfigured them like a Potatohead. One of the doktors got slack from dokhtars recently, ending up getting his license revoked and a lotta lip for the lipo.

Then there's MTV, which died at the turn of the millenium and turned into a turd-showcasing backwater of boy bands and JAPs - like the 'Sweet Sixteen' episode of a Persian teenager in Long Island asking her dad to buy a Lexus.

No other ethnic group in the world gets more nose jobs per year than Persians. I don't need to break open the Guinness to see what rhinoplasty records have been, um, broken. My kid sister got one recently, while still a student in grad school. She must've found a coupon in her package of Ramen Noodles from Costco.

I can understand why it's all the rage in Iran, since women's faces are the only part of the body allowed to be revealed in public. Gotcha. But do Persians in the Vest have to be sadly obsessed with a cookie-cutter sense of beauty?

Now the E! Network has been rolling out yet another obamination with "Keeping Up with the Kardashians", featuring the myopic kids of the late Armenian lawyer Robert Kardashian (of O.J. fame). It's easy to see that a lot of Persian kids in Cali are emulating the fakery.

I noticed all three Kardashian ladies listed 'Clueless' as their favorite movie on their respective MySpace pages. With all due (process) respect, the only thing these Beverly Hills girlies have in common with Cher & Co. is that they both had disgruntled divorced lawyers as fathers. Just sayin'.

Coincidentally I came across an article outing an attention-seeking douche going by the alias Nik Ritchie, who proudly boasts that he is "the world's first ever reality blogger" with the publishing of his wickedly low-(uni)brow website called The Dirty.  (WARNING: The Vizard of the Vestside will not be held responsible for IQ dropping several points). 


His real name being Hooman Abedi Karamian brings attention to his curious ethnic roots and toxic narcissism. He has a criminal record and a history of defamation lawsuits lobbed his way. In one of the HCwDB comment threads blasting his skullduggery, someone quipped "Why is it that Iranians tend to be the Guidos of the Middle East?" Ouch. Another knock to the rep. Nice work, Hoomeister.

That's all for now. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.

And by "chest" I mean artificially inflated boobies.





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