وزارد او دا وستساد
VIZITOR TO THE VESTSIDE
an
American blog of Iranian dissent

The Head of Al Cracka

As the Dubya era draws to a close, it's never too late to debrief yourself with this blissful breakdown of the 'War on Terror' from Chris Rock. I thought of it the recently during the Vice Presidential debate, but then it really hit me late last night when I had the misfortune of finding myself stranded in El Segundo.

That's a weird little enclave next to LAX where I've been subletting a bedroom in a large house steps away from the smelliest beach in California. It's close to a nice mall in Manhattan Beach with a Apple Store I go to, but the rotten apples don't fall far from the tree. In the run up to next month's elections, the town has served as the local headquarters for those opposing the Prop 8 referendum legalizing gay marriage.  One time an angry white dude hopped out of his pickup truck at an El Segundo Starbucks, threatening to "key" the side panel of my rental car. Random racism is basically what this town is about.

So I headed there late last night for the closest In-and-Out to the airport. After picking up a burger and fries, I headed out into the deep darkness of the twilight on Sepulveda, and walked up the street searching to catch a cab. Streets were eerily abandoned.

I walked past a run-down bar that was emptying out at the time, and lo and behold, a couple of (drunken?) frat boys decided to heckle me whilst I was standing at an intersection trying to grab a yellow cab.

"HEY PERSIAN BOY......GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM" one of them shouted. I hated the fact that he had pin-pointed my ethnicity. I generally don't look that Irooni. It was like my cover had been blown.

His partner in crime, meanwhile, ridiculed the awesome Kangol cap I was wearing.

Now I usually come in peace, and don't want to come back in pieces. But I felt like picking up a metal barbell off the curb and smashing their crooked teeth in. I thought the better of it and instead laid in a couple of parting verbal shots about their ugly girlfriends, likely low IQs, and shitty fashion sense.

Never make fun of someone's Kangol cap, cracka.

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